Is the internet stressed out?

Showing signs of Histrionic Personality Disorder

Jeffrey Denny

I worry about the internet.

It seems really tense and anxious. Easily triggered and overreactive. Riding an emotional roller coaster. In desperate need of a mood stabilizer.

Take a look at the headlines from one recent week:

Monday: Internet literally swoons over TikTok of fainting goat.

Tuesday: Internet erupts over jaw-dropping video of volcanic disaster.

Wednesday: Internet poops pants over dysentery outbreak.

Thursday: Internet blows up over photos of Hindenburg disaster that few under 40 know about because it happened before they were born.

Friday: Internet melts down over mouth-watering grilled tuna and cheese sandwich.

Saturday: Internet thirsts for Timothée Chalamet drinking from a garden hose after mowing his lawn shirtless.

Sunday: Internet, exhausted from another emotional week, sleeps in, has coffee and reads the papers, heads out to meet friends for nice brunch, then spends afternoon on the Internet to relax but instead gets stressed out about Trump.

Maybe the internet is spending too much time on the internet.

Jeffrey Denny is a Washington writer.