How about pro-vax conspiracy theories?
Leveraging what a fool believes
Jeffrey Denny
Covid-19 vaccine resisters happily, even haughtily, swallow and spread whack-job conspiracy theories about the mortal dangers of the shots.
Playing whack-a-mole to beat down the vaccine lies as they pop up clearly isn’t working. The objective factual actual proven truth can never beat 20th century philosopher George Costanza’s dictum, “It’s not a lie if you believe it.”
Thus, President Joe Biden and sensible Americans are getting desperate for ways to penetrate the mulish skulls of ornery contrary people, people the Covid-19 virus calls useful idiots for keeping the pandemic alive, thriving and spreading.
But what if we paid a secret army of internet trolls to spread positive misinformation about the amazing side effects of the Covid vaccines that everyone is talking about but the liberal media is covering up?
What if we took a page from email spammers, right-wing media advertisers for dubious health supplements, and Facebook posters who spread all manner of nut-job disinformation?
In other words, let’s lemonade the lemon by launching “Operation Covid Knucklehead.”
Let’s set up troll farms — or partner with the Russian ones — to spread internet dezinformatsiya that could make foolish anti-vaxxers want to get shots.
For example:
· The Moderna is guaranteed to enhance your male performance! And her pleasure!
· The Pfizer will melt off 50 pounds in just seven days without all those annoying health diets and exercise that don’t work, or double your money back.
· The J&J has been demonstrated in Swedish clinical studies to not only reverse male baldness, but produce a full head of long, thick, lustrous, heavy-metal rock star hair in just 30 days.
· Want to look younger? Forget the anti-aging potions, lotions, serums, creams, and facial peels. Don’t spend millions on cosmetic surgery to keep your spouse, mistress or boy toy. With its doctor-certified active ingredients hyaluronic acid, glycolic acid, Vitamin C, and rabbit placenta, a Covid booster will melt decades off your look overnight!
· Don’t trust Big Pharma and Western “healthcare.” The Chinese Sinopharm and Sinovac injective treatments are proven to prevent intubation. They contain an ancient secret herbal life-prolonging ingredient from the mysterious Orient that the corrupt Capitalist Western medicine doesn’t want you to know about. Also, the Chinese made the Covid so you know they have the antidote.
· There is a problem with your Social Security, Medicare, IRS taxes, auto warranty, home warranty, computer security, sex life or what the AOC progressive mainstream media Biden-Harris-Pelosi-Schumer-Maxine Waters Socialist Democrat Deep State liberals are doing to destroy America. Click here for a solution. [A link to schedule a Covid shot.]
· You’re a true, red-white-blue American patriot. You love freedom. You hate the liberals and their fascist Nazi Socialist totalitarian dictator government that’s using their fake Covid pandemic as a pretense to control you. It’s your body and your freedom!
Fight back with a Freedom Shot®.
A Freedom Shot will guarantee your liberty to do whatever you want! It will immunize you from the liberals who want to control your freedom, like those Texas citizen vigilantes are doing with their women! Fight the libs by getting a Freedom Shot!
Jeffrey Denny is a Washington writer.
