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Jeffrey Denny
Jeffrey Denny

383 Followers

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Waiting for Uber
Waiting for Uber

Collection of my least-worst "humor" on Medium

2019

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Jeffrey Denny
Jeffrey Denny

Stories

1 day ago

How Republicans can win on abortion

It’s the messaging, stupid — Jeffrey Denny MEMORANDUM To: Ronna McDaniel, Chair, Republican National Committee From: Craven Consulting Group, LLC Re: Turning abortion defeat into victory So, we took an Obama-level “shellacking” on abortion on Nov. 7. We’ve been losing on the issue ever since our Supreme Court gave us the Dobbs decision we fought…

Humor

6 min read

How Republicans can win on abortion
How Republicans can win on abortion
Humor

6 min read


Nov 22

Baby Bachelor

“To whom shall I give my binky?” — Jeffrey Denny “Baby Bachelor,” from the producers of “The Bachelor,” “The Bachelorette,” and “Golden Bachelor,” is a new smash-hit reality dating game series every parent is talking about. On this unscripted show, hosted by AI-generated Mister Rogers, one hopeless romantic infant is given a first chance at love in the…

Humor

4 min read

Baby Bachelor
Baby Bachelor
Humor

4 min read


Nov 16

Is MAGA a cry for help?

Understanding “Resentment Enjoyment Disorder” — Jeffrey Denny I’m not a professional psychotherapist. Yet an utter lack of advanced degrees, training, and hard work hasn’t stopped the Amateur Therapy Industrial Complex from taking the internet by storm (but not like the German WWII Sturmabteilungen). So my ignorance won’t stop me from analyzing the most politically powerful…

Humor

5 min read

Is MAGA a cry for help?
Is MAGA a cry for help?
Humor

5 min read


Nov 13

Don’t retire elders

Talent that literally works — Jeffrey Denny Today’s progressive youth are uniquely sensitive to slights against agency and identity. That’s great. They’re teaching us empathy and respect. But somehow, ageism is an -ism that’s not only permitted, it’s somehow righteous. Nobody’s getting canceled, shamed or backlashed for hurtful slurs like “geezer.” Or for bashing elders…

Satire

6 min read

Don’t retire elders
Don’t retire elders
Satire

6 min read


Nov 10

“It doesn’t say I will. It says ‘intend.’”

Is Trump lying getting … weak? — Jeffrey Denny Does 2024 GOP presidential frontrunner Donald Trump still have what it takes to lead our nation as Liar in Chief? Certainly our 45th president’s lying lips are still moving. Even in New York federal court when his loose lips are sinking his ships. Not even a gag order…

Trump

4 min read

“It doesn’t say I will. It says ‘intend.’”
“It doesn’t say I will. It says ‘intend.’”
Trump

4 min read


Nov 5

Defund the fashion police

Schmatta lives matter — Jeffrey Denny Feeling stressed, anxious, traumatized and terrified about what to wear today? Whatever your gender identity, here’s a tip from Vogue reporting from the 2023 Paris Fashion Week: “Khaite’s black Malek double-breasted blazer is a timeless take on this [“street style”] trend. Wear it with a pair of High…

Humor

6 min read

Defund the fashion police
Defund the fashion police
Humor

6 min read


Nov 1

Republicans bless Ultimate Speaker of the House

Seven surprising priorities on God’s legislative agenda — Jeffrey Denny “I believe that Scripture, the Bible, is very clear: that God is the one who raises up those in authority.” So said Mike Johnson, America’s first evangelical Christian to take the glorious throne next to God as House Speaker. While humbly pulling up an extra throne for Jesus. …

Commentary

4 min read

Republicans bless Ultimate Speaker of the House
Republicans bless Ultimate Speaker of the House
Commentary

4 min read


Oct 27

Axios “Smart Brevity” for loved ones

“Optimize your essential communications” — Jeffrey Denny Writers love when money-enslaving nonwriter bosses constructively suggest they read “Smart Brevity: The Power of Saying More with Less.” Then the nonwriters give the writers vague ideas to add. Because writers are telepathic. And while adding vague ideas, make the writing shorter. …

Satire

4 min read

Axios “Smart Brevity” for loved ones
Axios “Smart Brevity” for loved ones
Satire

4 min read


Oct 23

Help! I’m hooked on oil!

Victim of “Fossil Use Disorder” — Jeffrey Denny Don’t get me wrong: I care deeply about climate destruction and doom. But I’m addicted to fossil fuel. I’m Jeff, and I’m a petroholic. Feels good to finally admit that. Whew! What a load off. For me, fossil makes the sweet life possible. For instance: — My Bisphenol…

Humor

4 min read

Help! I’m hooked on oil!
Help! I’m hooked on oil!
Humor

4 min read


Oct 19

Stop calling it “populism”

It’s craven nihilism. Not so much unlike Hamas. — Jeffrey Denny “Hamilton’s besetting fear was that American democracy would be spoiled by demagogues who would mouth populist shibboleths to conceal their despotism.” So wrote Ron Chernow in his “Alexander Hamilton” biography. Yet here we are, some 2.5 centuries after Hamilton, with despots posing as populists and spoiling our democracy…

Political

4 min read

Stop calling it “populism”
Stop calling it “populism”
Political

4 min read

Jeffrey Denny

Jeffrey Denny

383 Followers

Book Author

A Pullet Surprise-winning writer who always appreciates free chicken.

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